Waiting for the corner
just a glimpse
so I can see where I might turn.
Where the tears will slow
and my heart will beat
without the pain of breakage.
Unaccustomed to this stasis
the corner seems but a dream
So I lean
I lean into the grief
I lean away
I sway in the numbness
but a momentary relief
I am not asking for rescue
nor do I dare expect release
only hope that it can’t, it won’t, get worse
yet somehow it does.
Each morning’s first thought is
I don’t want to live in a world
where you are not
and fear the grief will take
up residence and abscess my heart,
the valve will fail and the dominoes fall
But your brothers have lost a brother
They cannot, will not, lose a mother
From the couch I launch my battle cry
It is a sobbing whimper but a defiant sound
nonetheless.
A yawp yet to be